Next period (Our school year is divided into 5 periods.) our school will be celebrating International Day, when the students from the English side set up stalls representing various countries they are familiar with, as well as various performances. If I correctly recall the day also coincides purposely with the UN Peace Day (I think it was.)

I volunteered to create the stall for Britain with my classmates Joshua and Klaus. Joshua being actually British, Klaus and I being mere wannabes. We soon found we had plenty of excellent ideas, the prominent of them being tea... yes "a f**kload of tea" as Klaus elloquently put it. In addition to the constant tea service to be sponsored by the student council, we will also have an iPod with speakers blaring out patriotic imperial tunes: Rule Britannia, Land of Hope and Glory, God Save The Queen and all the modern adaptations of said tunes.

Upon further inspection I found my home to be full of suitably quintessential memorobilia. A post box style piggy bank, my old school uniform, my dad's old bowler hat (unfortunately far too small for my big 'ead,) and a whopping great photobook of London from the air. The only thing we're really missing is a Union Jack and a portrait of Queen Victoria in a stylish frame. Joshua plans to go further however, as he plans to cover the table with a "quilt" made of pictures of famous British people and places.

I will also take it upon myself to give an appropriate impression when manning the stall. Although I wont be able to wear the bowler hat, I will sit casually behind the table, sipping my Earl Grey tea while perusing the latest copy of The Times, which I can fetch the same morning from the newsagents.

Personally I will be happy if we manage to inflict our naïve Finnish student fellows with some traditional empire propaganda, ensuring ridiculous misconceptions for generations to come. We might even steal the show with our patriotic music and our free tea.  Especially the tea. Impoverished students will home in on anything free...

"Whoho, check it out, free tea!"

"Ah, I'm not really into tea, quite disgusting stuff really... oh wait, you say its free? Quick before it run's out! Be sure to take some extra cups incase there's a limited supply and we won't be able to get any more later!"

"Perhaps I should go fetch some buckets from the cleaning cupboard? Just to make the most of it, you never know when the next opportinuty for free tea crops up!"